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  • Writer's pictureAnat Ishai

I’m not running away, I’m running towards....

Escaping reality sounds about good right now. For those of us in Canada this feels like a déjà vu gone wrong all over again. Making sense of senseless is of no use and the greatest fight we are struggling with is our internal dialogue. We all want to away from the constriction, the mundane, the constant feeling of when are we getting back to being us again.

Since nothing makes sense these days....I'll continue on that line of thinking, so let‘s flip the script. Is this storm we are in senseless? For those of us who are faith driven and believe in a higher power, does it not feel like maybe the storm is here to clear a path for us? I was speaking to a friend last week and both agreed that there are things we would have never considered a year ago. We were all on a path, ones that we carved out, others that we passively followed...but now what is our path? Have you considered an alternative to your life? Perhaps you‘ve lost some faith due to the lack of structured religious life and access to religious institutions and community gatherings. Maybe your faith and focus have strengthened and you’ve developed a newfound sense of connection and hope for the future. Either way, what was, is no longer...change was inevitable and if you didn’t change actively, then you were pushed on the moving conveyor belt of life

For a lot of us, life BC (before Covid) maybe wasn't so bad. Sure we had our problems and our insecurities, but we had a sense of consistency and perhaps little fear of the unknown. So what now? Have we got used to this "new normal?" I hope not! This period of time to me is transition time. Humour me for a minute and visualize what's in my head. Imagine being in an amazon factory with moving boxes being shuffled around, some boxes containing fragile items...some not, some boxes being packaged for prime delivery shipment others not. Lots of moving pieces but no shipment is yet at their final destination to be used by their buyer. That's what this time feels like to me. People are moving, jobs have been created for terminated, children are in school out of school, families reunited and then distanced again. Modes of currency are going digital, what is deemed "essential or essential workers" is being redefined. Ultimately, we are in the transition!

But, in every situation one finds him/herself in, you must ask yourself a series of questions. Do I agree/disagree? Does this serve me? Will I go with the flow or against the crowd? Will I run away or run towards? I've been thinking a lot about running. Yes, I've been running a lot, I've been on my treadmill moving my body so I can move my mind. I've been going no where but everywhere. There is a part of us that needs to escape our reality, but our mind rationalizes why we should stay. Our greatest tool "our brain" becomes our "greatest weapon" and works against us when we want to actively make a change. There is nothing wrong with running, but in our quest for change we need to examine if we are running away from something or running towards something? I learnt a long time ago that if I don't change my mindset it won't matter where I go, my problems will follow me. But when I cultivate a new direction for my life, and I cushion myself with community, prayers, educational resources in faith, mindset and personal development than running towards my new life doesn't feel so frightening. We are all running these days (mostly in our minds), but have you paused long enough to decide if your running away from it all... or running towards your intended life?

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